You want to show your husband how much you love him every day. This is what you promised yourself you would do after you got married. But then, after years of being together, he suddenly became cold to you. Can there be something that you did that would make him be this way? Is it the way you look? Is it the way you treat him? Or is the love just gone?
10 Significant Signs My Husband is Not Attracted to Me Anymore
You do not See Him Ask for “it” Anymore.
Do you remember your first days together? It took him only a few days or even hours to recover before wanting to do it again with you. Yes, as time goes by, sex will become less and less frequent.
A lot of factors contribute to a sexless marriage. Some of these may include age, medical conditions, number of children present at home, grief, depression, history of trauma, secrets, and lack of trust. If you feel that some of these may be the cause of you not being intimate together, you must ask him about it.
How can I tell if I am having a less-than-average sex marriage? According to this article from the Huffington Post, a sexless marriage constitutes marital relations not exceeding 10 occasions per year. That is almost once a month. If you are having this kind of marriage, it can be a sign that he is not attracted to you anymore.
He does not Look at the Same as He Did Before.
Age can definitely reduce the twinkle in the eye of your husband when he looks at you. But it will still exist throughout the duration of the marriage. He still sees you as the woman who makes his heart beat, the girl who said yes, and the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with.
The only way to confirm this is by looking him straight in the eye and seeing if the attraction is still there. You will feel it. And your heart will definitely settle whether he still feels the same about you or not.
He does not Show His Desire for You Through His Actions.
When your husband is attracted to you, he will do everything he can to be close to you. He will kiss you non-stop. He will try to cuddle with you on the couch as you watch a movie. He will hold your hand when you are walking along the street. He will whisper sweet nothings to your ear.
But if he does not show even the simplest acts of yearning for you, then it can be a questionable warning that he is not attracted to you anymore.
What if you just initiate the contact? Chances are, if he is not longing for you, he will try to do what he can to be farther away from you. He may remove his arms when you sit together. He may put a pillow or something to separate your bodies when you sleep. And he will consistently pull away in order to put some distance between him and you.
He Eyes Other Women.
Nothing hurts more than seeing your husband desire other women. It is a pain in your heart, knowing that the love of your life desires another person. It is just plain wrong. Even when he is with you, his eyes will seem like they are out of his control.
If a woman of his liking goes near his radius of vision, he will not let a moment pass him by without looking at the person. It is quite disrespectful to you, to say the least. And it is a telltale sign that he is not attracted to you anymore. He is more interested in feasting his eyes on another woman than doing so with you.
He Wants to Work More Than Stay Home.
You should not mistake working overtime for your future with working in the office just to stay away from you. I don’t know about you, but there is a gut feeling among women if something is not right.
You should know all about his personal aspirations and his plans for you as a family. If he does more work for the welfare of his family, then that is all well and good. But if you are in a good enough financial position, and he still wants to be in the office and not stay with you even in the most important events in your life, like a birthday or anniversary, then it can be a sign that he is not attracted to you anymore.
He Flirts with Other Women.
When a man commits his life to a woman, it means that he is giving all of himself to her. A man, being a husband to his wife, should only focus on his wife. All his attention, his efforts, his finances, and his attraction should be going only to his wife.
The husband should not go around the office or any public place and flirt with other women. He should only be committed to you. You should only be the one enjoying him in that manner. He must not give that feeling of attention and intention toward another woman.
If you see him play around and flirt with another woman, then you should ask him about his actions. Are you not enough for him? If he cannot pinpoint something that is wrong, or would not tell you the reason, then maybe he is not into you anymore.
He Likes His Hobbies More Than You.
A wife should never restrict her husband from the things that he loves, especially the ones that he did even before you met each other. It is unhealthy in the relationship. He will also feel the restrictions in the marriage.
But it should also be a compromise. The husband should give a sufficient amount of time for his wife, for his family, and for his hobbies. If he is so fixated on pursuing his interests that your relationship suffers, then it is not right for your marriage.
The wife should be above everything else. He made a vow not to put other things before you. And he should fulfill that promise every single day.
No Romance Exists Anymore.
Is the love gone? Are there no more walks in the park? Does he not date you anymore? Don’t you ever stay underneath the bright stars and infinite sky as you lay in his arms and talk about what the future holds for both of you?
If you are not experiencing these things, then he is not making an effort to give you the best moments of your life as husband and wife. He is not going the extra mile to make you feel special and important.
All that’s relevant is for him to work, go home and do it all over again. Your relationship is very important and needs to be taken care of every day. If the romance in marriage vanishes, then the relationship will continue to deteriorate.
The Fighting Becomes More Frequent.
If you are attracted to the person next to you, then you will see that not all disagreements should lead to fights. Because he sees the beauty that is in front of him, he should understand that any differences should be settled without the need for arguments.
He should also care about the way you look. The more fights you have, the more stress there will be in your life. Instead of bringing disputes to him, you should only show what is important. Any petty quarrels should be avoided.
If your husband does not care for you anymore, then he will show his all-out anger to you. Not loving and caring only means that he is not attracted to you anymore.
The Conversations Become Awkward with Time.
As you build your relationship in your marriage, you are supposed to feel more at ease with each other. You should not feel obliged to talk or feel uncomfortable.
If he is attracted to you, he will do everything he can to engage you in conversation and make you feel loved. But if he does not desire you anymore, then you may have lost the chance to restore your relationship.
Fault in the attraction between a husband and a wife can be caused by you or him. It can be biological, physical, or even emotional. But one thing is for sure—there is a reason why he feels that way toward you.
Marriage takes a lot of effort in regards to working things out and figuring the answers to problems between couples. All you have to do is to talk to each other about it,communicate your feelings, and make sure to arrive at a concrete solution to your issues.
Mike Zhang. Founder of FamilyLifeShare